Omelan di petang hari..

Perihal independence and SAHM vs FTWM..

Akhir-akhir ni selalu terbaca kat FB pasal suami yang prefer wife tak kerja sebab nak besarkan anak sendiri and jaga rumah sendiri without maid. At first, I just read through it like any other articles in the Internet, tapi lepas baca banyak paragraph, macam terkesan pulak dalam hati. In my opinion, the writer is closed minded, pessimistic and negative terlebih terhadap FTWM ni.

Me and my husband are both being raised by FTWM. We turn out okay, our parents are still together and loving towards each other. We recognized our mom's cooking and our house was never a jungle of mess.

My husband prefer me working because he wants me to have a life outside our small family. He falls in love with me initially not because I am a good cook or a a good homemaker or a good mother. I was (and still am!) an independent girl with my own strong mind and I am an equal to him intellectually. I have been on my own since 18 years old and I am still maintaining my authority over my life now.

.. and I believe he loves that about me. 

Tetibe terfikir.. if aku tak putus cinta and frust teruk masa umur 24 tu, mungkin I am a different person now. My breakup actually change my core belief about life... and lepas tu baru aku betul-betul baik dengan husband aku.

I have talked to him about this.. about me working full time and my career always take me away from family. Sometimes for 1 day and sometimes for 1 week.. and at the end of this year, it may takes us apart for 1 or 2 years. I love being with him every night, but looking at the economic situation.. I will grab whatever opportunity that I get to earn more for the family and I need his support for me to be able to do it.

But, to balance between my career and motherhood.. well, it is hard. I tried and I know. 

I may not be able to smother my son with kisses for all his accomplishment, nor witness his every tears and joy. Nevertheless, I still cooked for him on weekends and a few meals on weekdays. He is still breastfed (albeit not exclusively anymore) and I never let him sleep with his granny at night. By hook or by crook.. he must be with me when the night comes..

Financially, my husband provided the needs and I compliment our life with the wants. If they said FTWM is money oriented because we simply cannot live solely on our husband's income.. well.. again, I am accustomed to the good life where I can get things tanpa perlu tadah tangan mintak nafkah zahir dari suami. 

Dari zaman terlajak single dulu, time aku berdoa ditemukan jodoh.. aku cuma berharap dapat suami yang baik dan tak menyusahkan aku. Literally. 

Jika dapat menumpang senang alhamdulillah.. tapi, aku bersyukur jika hidup aku tidak bertambah susah... dan Allah kabulkan permintaan aku. 

My husband is a gem and I love him so very much :)